Rivers Don't Set Goals

Rivers Don't Set Goals

So here is the new year. How are the resolutions holding up?

Setting goals only half works for me. What actually changes anything is moving in a direction. I would rather work on habits.

Life does not run in straight lines and cannot be planned all the way through. Rivers go to the sea in loops. Set off for a point on a map and you never know what is around the next bend. Possibly locals who dislike strangers. Possibly friends throwing a party you knew nothing about. Possibly — God forbid — sirens, singing beautifully, and there goes the steering.

All of it experienced, in a manner of speaking.

So I work on habits and on the values I want attached to my name. An example: I decide to be a man who goes to the gym. Rather than setting a target of twice a week, I let a small realistic routine grow into the day, one that fits the direction I am going anyway.

Another: I decide to keep company only with honest people. Rather than tearing up old friendships with a crowbar, I turn slowly towards the ones who deserve it.

Direction beats destination, because a river that is going the right way will get there without a plan, and one that isn't will arrive somewhere it never meant to be.

Letters from a Parked Car. About once a month.

A list kept by hand. One word, “remove”, and your address is gone.